dry, dry flowerbeds.

[Honorable Mentions are in alphabetical order.]

FILM
1. Certified Copy
2. A Separation
3. The Tree of Life
4. Drive
5. Putty Hill
6. Mysteries of Lisbon
7. Take Shelter
8. Tomboy
9. Margaret
10. The Descendants

Honorable Mentions: 13 Assassins, Beginners, Bellflower, A Dangerous Method, The Future, Le Harve, Meek’s Cutoff, Mignight in Paris, Submarine, Terri

—

MUSIC
1. Real Estate - Days
2. Yuck - Yuck
3. Fleet Foxes - Helplessness Blues
4. Destroyer - Kaputt
5. PJ Harvey - Let England Shake
6. Kurt Vile - Smoke Ring For My Halo
7. Cymbals Eat Guitars - Lenses Alien
8. Wild Beasts - Smother
9. Girls - Father, Son, Holy Ghost
10. St. Vincent - Strange Mercy

Honorable Mentions: Shabazz Palaces - Black Up, Bon Iver - Bon Iver, Cults - Cults, Neon Indian - Era Extraña, Atlas Sound - Parallax, Oneohtrix Point Never - Replica, Drake - Take Care, Jay-Z and Kanye West - Watch the Throne, Tune-Yards - w h o k i l l, Lykke Li - Wounded Rhymes

—

TV
1. Breaking Bad
2. Louie
3. Justified
4. Game of Thrones
5. Parks and Recreation
6. Archer
7. Homeland
8. Community
9. Boardwalk Empire
10. Childrens Hospital

Honorable Mentions: Adventure Time/Regular Show, American Dad!, Bored to Death, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Enlightened, Futurama, How to Make It in America, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Treme, The Walking Dead

—

GAMES
1. The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword
2. Batman: Arkham City
3. Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception
4. Portal 2
5. Super Mario 3D Land
6. Rayman Origins
7. Pokémon Black and White
8. Kirby’s Return to Dreamland
9. Disgaea 4: A Promise Unforgotten
10. Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3

Honorable Mentions: Catherine, Child of Eden, El Shaddai: Ascension of the Metatron, Infamous 2, The King of Fighters XIII, LittleBigPlanet 2, Okamiden, Radiant Historia, Resistance 3, Tactics Ogre: Let Us Cling Together

Then, she turned to Prince Gumball and said “I hope Ice King will sweep me off my feet and take me to the farthest corner of Ooo, where we will kiss and eat a whole bunch until we get fat and die.”

/fanficwithinfanfic

Director(s): John Lasseter, Brad Lewis
Screenplay: Ben Queen
Cast: Larry the Cable Guy, Owen Wilson, Michael Caine, Emily Mortimer, Eddie Izzard, John Turturro, Thomas Kretschmann, Joe Mantegna, Franco Nero, Bonnie Hunt, Tony Shalhoub, Jeff Garlin, Bruce Campbell, Vanessa Redgrave, Cheech Marin, Paul Dooley, Richard Kind, John Ratzenberger
Distributor: Walt Disney Pictures
Runtime: 107 min.
Rating: G
Year: 2011

The core problem with Pixar’s Cars films is the titular automobiles themselves. They lack the easily anthropomorphized qualities of the company’s other digitally rendered non-human emotional fodder: toys, robots or animals; take your pick. Whereas the first outing (not my favorite of the studio’s endeavors, but an altogether decent production) focused on a fast vehicle (Owen Wilson’s Lightning McQueen), forcing him to slow down and experience life’s simplistic pleasures in humble Radiator Springs, this quasi-sequel does the opposite with Larry the Cable Guy’s annoying-as-all-hell Mater, sending him off on a pointless espionage escapade spanning stereotyped versions of Japan, Italy and England to a less than satisfactory effect.

Ben Queen’s script is simply overstuffed with spy thriller-cliché nonsense that pales in comparison to something like the masterful Sunnyside Daycare jailbreak attempt setpiece in Toy Story 3. Above all, there is little moral ground to stand on. Mater is a ridiculous character to place into the forefront, and the new supporting cast is, pun very intended, a batch of lemons. Even the seasoned talents of Michael Caine, Emily Mortimer and John Turtorro come up short due to the wholly lax screenplay.

The final nail in the coffin is essentially that the end result fails to hold a candle to not only past Pixar efforts (following the original Cars, each new work has aesthetically surpassed its predecessor by leagues), but other more refined animated titles released this year (Rango, Kung-Fu Panda 2) as well. It appears as if the Oscar will be sufficiently out of the former champion’s grasp come the evening of February 26th, 2012. Hopefully this will please those who believed DreamWorks’ How to Train Your Dragon to be the rightful recipient of last year’s award. Yes, I am a member of that loyally segregated camp.

Grade: C-

Well done.

♥___♥

Apparently Kyubey’s wrath knows no bounds, as it extends into other anime.

I think Victorique maintains a slight chance of outwitting the bastard.

I cannot argue with any of this.

Squid Carl.

Variant on a theme.

Oh shit.